Why I said NO to a shiny tax-free job offer and committed to consistency in my new business.

What? Huh? Why? Three of the key responses I received when I shared the news that I had turned down not one, not two, but three job offers in Dubai.

I even said What? Huh? And why? to myself several times before and even AFTER I had already made my decisions.

“This is the foundation for your future! You must take it!” Said my well-meaning family and friends. Sunshine and tax-free salaries are enough to entice anyone; just ask any of our expat teacher colleagues.

It took me a few months to own my decision to say no. I turned off the social media comments to avoid viewing Instagram stories of the “Dubai Dream” and to curb my FOMO (Fear of Missing Out).

What’s this new psychological feeling? (I ask myself - the psychologist, and of course ChatGPT - a non-psychologist whom I do NOT recommend!). The latter told me that I turned down external validation, security and fantasy and that I am probably feeling a sense of scarcity bias, wondering “what if these opportunities never come again?” Mr GPT was somewhat right – at least about the so-called perceived notion of turning down “security.”

I had just launched a new idea – Educational Frontiers, a wellness and career support community for psychologists and aspiring psychologists. I had huge interest from my peers, and I was keen to keep the momentum going. Somehow, the idea of exchanging my re-ignited creativity, passion for supporting others and work-life balance for “security” in a stable tax-free job just didn’t let me rest. Literally. I had sleepless nights worrying about whether I had done the right thing.

I have shared before that choosing self-employment can be met with judgment and misunderstanding. Self-employment is not the traditional route, but I have never been a traditional girl. I initially did what everyone suggested. I wrote a pros-and-cons list. Admittedly, there were more pros than cons in favour of accepting the job offer. What I couldn’t ignore was my intuition (yup, my non-traditional stance kicking in). It made me feel uneasy for days as I wrestled with my thoughts or what psychologist Daniel Kahneman would call fast thinking (instinct and gut reactions) vs slow thinking (analytical and logical).

In the end, I made a decision based on my current values. I value autonomy, I value choosing how I spend my time and the work I do. I value wellness and work-life balance. I chose to bet on (and invest my time and money into) myself and my business rather than someone else’s.

I have always believed in myself and my dreams. It is part of how I came from a London special-measures secondary school to being a doctor. “We believe in you too!” Was the resounding feedback I eventually got from friends and family. Colleagues were so confident in me that they said they would love to work for me. Just like that, I realised, I wasn’t ready to become an employee again. I wanted to be an employer who helps shape workplace culture and create a balance between work and wellness for psychologists. Whilst I don’t have any vacancies (Yet! A bit of Growth Mindset), the thought that people trust in my vision was enough to erase the fear of failure.

When you’re building your own business, you’re not just creating income — you’re creating autonomy and ownership. A job can offer security and status. But it also comes with constraints: priorities you don’t set, timelines you don’t control, equity you don’t own.

Sometimes the bravest move isn’t chasing something new. It’s staying consistent long enough for compounding effects to kick in. If I don’t commit to my own dreams, why would any investors care to do the same?

I read somewhere, in a random post (though probably thrown my way through the algorithm), that “comfort is expensive.” No, they weren’t talking about the expensive and comfortable life in Dubai. They meant that sometimes having a sense of “security” in the form of a monthly salary can lower your willingness to explore new frontiers, to take chances on yourself and your ideas. Entrepreneurship requires a different kind of self-trust, but I am committed to trusting in myself.